You proposed and she said yes! Now that you’re officially engaged, the chaos begins. This planning a preparation time often makes you feel as if you want to elope or better yet, ship your fiance off to the funny farm. You can survive this crazy engagement with a little bit of patience and a little bit of romance. Yes, I said romance. At times, it may be the last thing on your mind, but a little extra love and romance during this time will strengthen your relationship and make it even stronger for the future. Read through these 10 tips to help you keep the romance alive during your engagement.
Take Pictures — Lots of them!
Your fiance is so busy during this time that she’s often not thinking about enjoying the planning process itself. This is where you come in by taking pictures throughout the engagement and wedding planning process. Snap photos at any event that she won’t be present at (your bachelor party, tux fittings, etc). Keep the camera at hand and snap photos anytime you see an opportune moment, such as her and her bridesmaids putting together favors or her and her mom addressing the invitations. After the wedding, put it all together in a photo album or scrapbook for her.
Ok, not really. Be honest when your fiance asks your opinion and make suggestions, but don’t be overly picky. If you feel strongly about it, whether it be the reception site, ceremony site, your vows, or even a cake flavor, speak up! Your fiance is likely very stressed during this time, so pick your fights carefully. If you don’t have a strong opinion on something, just go with the flow.
Offer to Help.
Brides usually start planning right away and generally end up in control of the entire planning process. In fact, your fiance probably purchased a wedding planner the day after you proposed. If you’re deeply involved in the whole process, then you can skip this step. If not, make an offer to help with different aspects of the planning process and then let her take you up on it. When she does ask for help, do everything you can to get it done and make it easy.
Ban all wedding talk on certain days of the week. Enjoy a dinner together and talk about what you did during the day, current events, friends & family, a good book, etc. Reconnect and talk like you did before wedding planning consumed your lives.
Make sure that you ‘date’ like you used did before the engagement. Go out to dinner or see a new movie. You’ll have fun together and reconnect away from the wedding stress.
This time period is a whirlwind of highs, lows, and complete craziness. De-stress your fiance with a little bit of romantic pampering. Surprise her with flowers. Set up a sensual bubble bath by candlelight and let her relax alone (or together if she chooses).
Just say no to your family.
Bickering families are a requirement during the engagement period. Well, maybe not a requirement, but it’s pretty much guaranteed to occur, so be prepared. Set the guidelines, make sure your families are aware of these guidelines, and then stick to them. If you set a maximum guest list number and they try to add additional names, just say no. If they’re unhappy with the dinner selections, cake flavor, wedding location, or anything else, gently remind them that this is your wedding. You may have a little more difficulty with this if your parents are paying for the wedding, but even in that case, set the boundaries up in the beginning to keep disagreements from happening down the road. If everyone plans happily, the two of you will be happier together.
Go away for the weekend.
Take a weekend getaway together to pick up the romance. Pick a romantic bed & breakfast in a nearby city and spend the whole weekend in bed together. Order in all of your food, watch a few movies, and talking… keep all wedding talk at home though.
Words of love.
Your engagement and wedding offers many opportunities for expressing your love via words. Write your fiance a letter to open on the morning of your wedding. Add a few love quotes, poems, or phrases that express your feelings for her. Talk to your fiance about writing your own vows. Writing your own vows allows you to personalize your ceremony and express your love to your wife-to-be on the most important day of your lives.
Have fun together!
If you do nothing else, just have fun. Lighten the mood with a little icing on the nose when you’re cake tasting. Practice dancing to your song together, walking down the aisle, or picking crazy songs for your reception. It’s these types of funny moments that make you remember why you’re doing this in the first place. The stress of planning lasts only a short time, but the fun and loving times you experience are what make the memories that you’ll never forget.